' Pain is what the patient says it is. ' Wise words from my pharmacology professor. I was reminded of his words today during an experience with a family member who was going through one of their awful 'spells.' These spells are the result of a brain tumor...a brain tumor just hangin' out. The doctors have said that it is benign, but how can anything taking up space in the brain, be benign? Anyway, the tumor just sits there, wreaking havoc, causing vertigo from Hades for this family member. I don't know what they're experiencing, but during this particular spell ( the worst I've witnessed), I felt...I can't explain. I wanted to help, but didn't know how. And it frustrated me. Do I touch, do I not touch??? Do I talk, do I not talk? 'Do you need this or that...are you sure???' I felt like my anxiety would just make it all worse. It made me wonder how I would offer support to laboring women. I mean every woman is different. Some require touch, while some can't tolerate the extra stimulation while they're 'riding the waves.' I just hope I can be sensitive to their needs when the time comes.
During my maternity semester, there were so many people in the room while a mom was laboring - the mom, support ( that could range from one to two people), nurse for mom, obgyn, nurse to help obgyn, nurse for baby, and if that's not enough - at least 4 nursing students. What kind of energy is in that room??? I felt like there wasn't much room , so to speak, for support and comfort. Sometimes a few words were given and maybe a pillow moved around, but that was about it. Many seem to think that comfort/support is the same as epidural. It's not.
I also noted that with the lack of emotional support, there tends to be a lack of respect. For example: there was a patient whom I had never met. She was not assigned to my nurse, so therefore I was not assigned to care for her. In nursing school, everyone wants to see a delivery , well two deliveries - a Csec and a vaginal. I had seen both, actually a few, and the atmosphere and standard of care really bothered me. This was at the end of the semester. So I wasnt really eager to see another delivery of that nature. Anyway, there was a lady who's husband was a doctor, and he was very supportive of her. From what I was told they were a sweet couple. They had never seen/met me nor some of the other nursing students, who wished to get in on more deliveries. The couple was familiar with two, maybe three students. When the mother went into labor, the students who were not assigned to that mother, wanted to go in. I didn't feel comfortable doing that. Next thing I know, someone came out of the room and said she had delivered. The students were upset they had missed the delivery.
One of the seasoned nurses, told them to go on in still- this nurse knew nothing really about the patient. I said we probably shouldn't, and this nurse looked at me like I was being silly, and insisted that we go on in. The nursing students jumped on it...and I made a stupid decision to reluctantly follow. As soon as I stepped in the room, I regretted it. The look on the mom's face, the look I had seen on every mom's face that semester after a delivery when they take the child away, and the mom is just lying there ( so many emotions going through her), legs still lifted in that contraption. There's no bonding. She can't even see her child, because there are fifty million nursing students/nurses surrounding her perfectly healthy child trying to get vitals/APGAR...And then there's a handful of students just staring at her vagina. The dad is just standing around bewildered. Luckily he's taller than all the nurses, so he can see...somewhat..his child. The dad/mom looked at the new influx of nursing students, like, 'who are you?' I smiled and promptly walked backed out and vowed to never do that again. I felt so bad.
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